08/03/2007 : CMC Visit:  I had to go to the CMC hospital to collect Geetha’s death certificate and other medical reports. Went through the ward where she was admitted and saw mumerous other patients suffering the same way as Geetha. The nurses there who knew Geetha recognized me and offered their sympathies. Patients whom she had interacted with and educated when she was in a stable condition came forward. And still many who had no idea of what was happening to them and what they were dealing with approached me for information.

I met Dr. Mammen Chandy shortly after that and all other doctors who had treated her. I had expressed interest in helping out the patients from the funds collected. An educational and informational aide for creating cancer awareness in the local Indian languages was the first need that came to light. There is no National Registry in India for the Marrow registries and the doctors there expressed it as an extreme need. I was given names of some individuals who are working towards the same and will be getting in touch with them to see how we can help.

 07/26/2007 12:30 AM:  Arrived at the airport where my sister-in-law Ganga and Lakshmi were waiting. Having lost both their parents and a brother earlier in hospitals they had given everything to this effort. “Jijaji (brother-in-law) we lost again” was the only thing they said and broke down. It was a long hard drive of 4 hours from there to our little village.

I saw my sister finally amongst relatives and friends in our home lying in a ice box looking like nothing she ever looked in her entire life, Mom wailing next to her body and all the relatives and friends looking at me. I was facing my biggest failure ever. I stood there I know not for how long looking at my sister. Harsha, Geetha’s daughter was in the bedroom and refused to come out. She did not recognize her mom in the hall or her little mind refused to acknowledge the happenings. She had not seen her mom for more than two months. Kathir was fainting numerous times throughout the day. Dad was silent all the while with tears pouring down.  Geetha was cremated around noon in Arangal Durugam village.

07/24/2007 6:00 PM:  It was the longest and hardest trip back home. I was watching myself as if all this was happening to someone else. I kept giving away cards from saveGeetha effort to everyone who I spoke to as a habit still hoping that things might have changed, some miracle might have happened.

And at other times I was unable to forgive myself for not keeping my promise to Geetha, to get her out of this. Where did I go wrong, what did we miss, should we have got her out of India as soon as the diagnosis was done? Could she have been brought here for the Clofarabine trial, instead of the FLAG-IDA if the doctors in India had responded to my mails earlier? Could they have not initiated a donor search earlier when we requested for it in April, instead of in July after the FLAG-IDA chemo was given?

Amidst all these crowded thoughts in my mind the crying voice of Geetha over the phone “Anna I don’t want another chemo please”  from June 23^rd just before the FLAG-IDA, echoed continuously. How am I going to face my parents? How are they dealing with it? What is happening to Kathir and Harsha? I can’t imagine and I am scared to think of that now.

07/24/2007:  I spoke to Dad at 2:00 AM . When he asked me to come immediately. I had got my tickets and don't know when I slept again but had dreamt talking to Geetha...we played badminton and she was giving me tips. It all seemed so real when I woke up and called Kathir again ....I had not known and asked if there was any improvements.. She feels no pain she is no more was the answer I got.

Harsha her daughter had been adamant in not seeing her mom at the hosptal for the last two months. If I go there then she won't come home to see me was her argument. Well mom finally is coming home but can't play with her anymore.

She suffered a lot for being with us for so long. 4 months of gruelling pain of the chemo and so many people helping out and to no avail not even a respite of 10 days to be with her daughter.

I have been here away for more than 7 years now and could do nothing for her...nothing at all.

07/24/2007: Yesterday we got a call from Viacord that they were able to harvest & store our daughter Akansha's stem cells from her cord blood successfully.

I spoke to dad early today morning. Some doctor in training in the ICU had told him that there is no use in keeping her there like that. He was very upset and mom was uncontrollable. I could not talk to her. After about 4 hours a senior doctor told my dad that the infection had spread to both the lungs now and that she might survive 24 hours more if nothing changes. I got a call at 2:00 AM from Dad. I am on my way to my little sister.

"Anna I don't want more chemo I will survive however much I can with tablets" is all I can remember now from her crying plea on 23rd June 2007, with my day old daughter and my wife beside me at CMC Charlotte. That was before the FLAG IDA was administered.

Would the counts improve by the time I reach her? Will she be able to fight the infection? Will she prove the doctors wrong again about her being critical? Will all our prayers work again ?

07/23/2007: We have seen no visual improvements yet and my parents continue to live in the corridors of CMC. The sight of her lying under the ventilators in ICU is hurting them and they are un-consolable for hours after the 15 minute visit allowed every day.

Doctors say that it takes people 20-25 days to recover from FLAG-IDA. Geetha might take a little longer. It is a race now with cancer. We need to be able to take her to a transplant center soon. Her counts are varying up and down now and we do not have the official counts as of 5 AM this morning.

Many of Geetha's friends from her college came to know about this recently and have joined in the effort to help her out. Many hearts from all over the world are getting together and raising support for Geetha now.

We were able to include a Guest book and are planning to read to her the support she is getting from all over everyday.

07/22/2007: Dad called today & gave some numbers again.All are looking at me for some answer..Is there something someone knows out there that can help Geetha?

Kidney efficiency :  1.3  ( it went down from 3 to .9 and increased again to 1.3, should be 0)

Pulse: 156 - 160 Temperature 105   Oxygen saturation 90-99  Morphine - 2mg/hour

Anti Fungal injection: Caspofungi WBC: 200 ( it went from 100 to 1000 to 100 and now back to 200)

 7/21/2007: Not sure what the the numbers mean but the Doctor said that the risk level has dropped from 2.9/3  to a 0.9 today. Geetha's condition in general (fever, breathing, blood pressure) etc have come to normal. They are giving a lot of potasium/sodium to stabilize her blood pressure. Kidney has started functioning now but is being assisted with dialysis. Her WBC count has fallen back to 100 fighting these fever and infections.

I am reading on MDS today (Mylodisplastic Syndromes). Dad, Mom and Kathir are leaving for the temple straight from the ICU after the visiting hours are over. They have spent 3 days now waiting and living in the corridors of CMC Vellore outside the ICU . Waiting for any nurse or doctor to come out with some good news ...some encouragement...observing every passing face for a emotional indication of what is going on and then when the visiting hours come and go they are still not sure until a doctor explains to them. Papa says it is hard to take to see her lying helpless and unconscious with oxygen tubes runing into her mouth.

I am looking at Akansha in the crib as I am writing this and I can only imagine what my parents might be going through there..

7/20/2007:  I returned back from the Indian consulate in DC today at 5:00 AM. I now have the passport renewed and am ready to apply for visas to any place that might accept her for a transplant. I unpacked my suitcase which I has prepard to leave for India just in case with a big sigh. My wife Jaya and 3 week old daughter Akansha smiled as I came back today and it was a big boost.

Geetha's blood counts(WBC) dropped to 400 today , but might be due to the fact that she is fighting the fever and infection. Her kidney seems to have started functioning now, though still in a semi-conscious state she responds to mom with her eye moments. Her fever and Blood pressure are returning to normal slowly. Doctors now say it might be well over a week to 10 days that she might be out of the oxygen and be back in her room again waiting for the move to a transplant center.

...The wait  where this journey for generating help  began three weeks back on July 4th. We all belive in the prayers that all of you, her supporters have in your heart to be the reason she is still with us. We request you to be with us in this journey to save Geetha throughout.

We will not be able to do this alone.......

7/19/2007: Geetha 's doctors announced at 3:00 AM even as I was driving to Washington DC to get my passport renewed for visas and any travels in case of emergencies. Her WBC counts had shot up to a 1000 from a mere 100. Her body had finally started fighting the infection. Still on oxygen but she is out of the critical condition and safe once again. Mom smiled through her tears and Dad had a big sigh of relief. We are hoping she will make it out of the ICU in two days ....Another battle won...for now..

07/18/2007: This has been a really frightful day for all of us. Geetha had severe pain after the WBC granules and some antifungal injection and had not slept at all the whole night. I could feel the tears in her husband's eyes when I spoke to him in the morning. She was also struggling with her breathing and had to be moved into Intensive care Unit. She is now on with oxygen. Mom and Dad went home together after a long long time as no one is allowed to stay with her in the ICU. They have just entered the hospital and I am shivering even thinking of calling them and asking them about Geetha. The breathing still seems to be a problem. We are hoping her stem cells kick in and start producing WBC's to fight off the infection soon.

 The website was down during the day today,with only the home page showing. I could not update anything here. I struggled with the fact that so many people who are helping us are looking at this and are praying with us for her. It felt like a life line was disconnected somehow a line of prayers that connected to all her supporters and her well being through these updates. It is back now and I feel I have you all with me in praying for her again. I don't feel alone anymore.....

07/17/2007: Geetha's white blood count is still low and there is some lung infection which the doctors say will go away as soon as her counts improve. She was being given some white blood corpusules from a donor today to help her count increase. We are not able to draw blood from her for the molecular typing for the donor search due to the low count. A donor search will be initiated based on her HLA typing report which we have currently from Histogenetics NY. Transplant centers are asking for a confirmation of remission for accepting her for transplantation and starting the search. Meanwhile her pain levels increased today and her morphine dose was increased to 2 mg per hour. Could not speak to her or my mom for 2 days now. Dad is keeping strong but sounded very feeble and disturbed. Hope the transfusion of WBC today helps her regain her strength. Our daughter Akansha's voice over the phone does seem to make her smile inspte of all this.

07/16/2007: The WBC counts are still in the low 200's and are not improving as fast as the doctors want. the bone marrow has to start producing cells faster. Some blood transfusion was needed and we have asked for O ve  blood from some volunteers in India. We will know more when the doctor gives his feedback tomorrow. We are still moving papers for the visas at this point.

07/15/2007: The Bone Marrow aspiration was unclear as the cell counts were very low. The Doctors are not sure if they are on top of the disease at present. Due to the fact that many transplant centers (most of them) insist on a confirmed remission to take her case we are stuck until another bone marrow test is done in two weeks. We were asked to approach all Transplant centers that can proceed on a donor search immediately meanwhile. We are looking at everything available and are short of many things including time and money. The only thing we have in ample is her courage and positive outlook to fight this disease and her confidence in her brother that he will definitely get her help in anyway possible. I live and breath on that confidence every second and hope to get her help quickly.

07/07/2007: No news yet from other hospitals. Fred Hutchinson seattle sent the consultation appt. letter for Aug 3rd.Trying to arrange for visa dates now. No money yet for the deposit but we are all hopeful. Its been 10 days since I heard Geetha's voice.

07/06/2007: Follow up calls from FredHutchinson. Spoke to Vinay's brother for a long time(www.helpVinay.org)  Geetha i s slowly gaining blood cells back and had some food today. Doctors want to do another bone marrow on 16th if the counts improve. We are waiting to see if she will get her remission.

07/05/2007: The day went very quick today. We got a call from Fred Hutchkinson in Seattle. Looks like the time left with us does not give us the luxury for a MUD search. We have to look at either cord blood transplant or a Haplo matched transplant. We are now trying to contact a hospital in Italy , Israel and also continue the US route. Fred Hutch has already sent the first invitation letter for a appointment.

07/04/2007: Today even as me and other volunteers were sending emails out we got the first check sent mail from a couple in California.( Hrishikesh & Sheetal Divate) . My tears this time were happy ones. It encouraged the whole team a lot and we started calling people with renewed energy. The picures parents sent from the hospital were uploaded yesterday. I have never seen the fear in their faces ever before..Its scary.

07/02/2007: Things seemed to be progressing a bit finally . Many are begining to volunteer but the work is going on in so many directions that I am confused. Many friends are now playing a active role in the fund raising effort. We have lots of goals right now to finish this website , to give a means of donating to the public and to create appeal letters. Today was a day where we just called all the hosptials here for an estimate. The doctors will have to look at the reports and it might be well into end of this week when we will know if NIH recieved the blood samples from India of Geetha. If her sample had enough tissues in  it for them to be able to test it.  

07/01/2007: It has been a week since we got the news about the Transplant from the doctors. Geetha is undergoing the chemo  called FLAG IDA generally given before the Bone Marrow Transplant. She is in a hospita in India with no immunity and exposed to infections where even a cold could kill her , just waiting for us to bring her here as soon as possible for the trasnplant. Her only chance for survival.